WWF Sunday Night Heat - 09/01/00
- Usual opening to start.
Match #1
WWF European Champion Val Venis vs Prince Albert
Huge "shave your back" sign in the crowd. Albert with a shoulderblock to start. "Shave your back" chant as Albert hits another shoulderblock. Venis with 2 lariats that have no effect. He tries for another and gets hit with a spinning sidewalk slam. Venis sent hard into the turnbuckle. Albert with TEH CLUBBING BLOWZ. Albert locks in a bearhug. Venis fights out of it but gets locked in a sleeper. Nice sit out powerbomb by Venis to counter. Back elbow by Val. Venis hits 2 clotheslines into the corner. Bossman comes to ringside as Venis drops Albert on a scoop slam attempt and almost gets pinned. Bossman whacks Albert with his nightstick as he hits the ropes and Venis hits the Fisherman Suplex for 3 at 3:13.
Match was fine, bit slow though. 1/2*
- The Godfather vs Gangrel is coming up later.
- The Headbangers are backstage with HHH and Steph. He wants the Headbangers to take out Too Cool in a match later. I should point out Thrasher is wearing a huge bra underneath his see through shirt.
Match #2
Steve Blackman vs Buck Quartermaine
3 guesses who will win this. Buck on the attack with a snap suplex for 1. Blackman with a tilt-a-whirl faceslam and some elbows. Blackman with some chops in the corner and a foot choke. Blackman with the neck snap on the top rope. Blackman sends Buck into the corner hard. He tosses Buck outside. Blackman with TEH CLUBBERING BLOWZ and a stalling suplex on the outside. Blackman dropkicks Buck off the apron. He tosses Buck back in but Buck hits a crossbody for 1. Steve with the lariat. Scoop slam but an elbow misses and Buck goes on the attack. Blackman with a belly-to-belly suplex. A pretty crappy looking Scissor kick will get the win at 4:03. Seriously, he barely hit the guy's stomach.
Long squash was long. 1/4*
- A video for the Royal Rumble plays.
- We look back at The Godfather and Gangrel rivalry. They fight in the main event.
- Edge and Christian helpfully tell us we are watching Heat. Thanks guys.
- The slam of the week shows the "pink slip on a pole" match from the final RAW of 1999.
- The Acolytes make their way to ringside. Farooq tells the New Age Outlaws they should be scared of the Acolytes. Bradshaw gets the mic and tells Billy the last time they met the NAO bled everywhere. Bradshaw says the match at the Rumble will be about beating the hell out of them. They say they will take the belts after they destroy the NAO. They say if they aren't down with that, they have 2 words etc.
- We take a special look at Chris Jericho at some Hockey game. This video goes on way too long. Seriously, I've aged about 6 years.
- We look at HHH and Steph's conversation with the Headbangers earlier.
Match #3
Too Cool vs The Headbangers
They actually get the ref and the ring announcer to dance. Awesome. Jesus, Mosh has a bra on now as well. Headbangers attack before the bell. Sexay with a body drop on Mosh and they double team Thrasher. Synchronized elbows hit on Mosh. Thrasher tells a random guy in the crowd to shut up. Scotty and Thrasher will start us off. Scotty with some punches in the corner. He hits the bulldog and readies the Worm. Mosh in illegally and hits Scotty with a lariat. Mosh tags in. They stomp Scotty in the corner. Mosh drops his leg across Scotty's head while he is draped over the rope. Thrasher tagged in. Double front suplex by Headbangers. Sunset flip attempt is successful for 2 for Scotty. Thrasher with a lariat. Mosh tagged in. Thrasher Frankensteiners Mosh onto Scotty in a sweet double team. Mosh takes his bra off. Scotty with a back suplex and he gets the hot tag to Sexay. Thrasher in as well. Sexay is a HOUSE OF FIRE BABEH. Powerslam gets 2 before Mosh breaks it up. Scotty gets rid of Mosh. Sexay goes up top and hits his Hip Hop Leg Drop while Scotty has a bearhug for the 3 at 5:26. Headbangers attack after the bell.
Good match. *3/4
- Rock tells us we are watching Heat. Thanks Rock, I almost forgot there for a second.
- We recap RAW from last week.
Match #4
The Godfather w/ Ho's vs Gangrel
Godfather hits the catchphrases before we start. Godfather attacks before the bell. Yes, again. Godfather with the punches in the corner. Big boot followed by a big back body drop. 2 Lariats and a scoop slam by Godfather. Luna shows up and chases Godfather's Ho's away. Gangrel with a DDT for 2. Luna chokes Godfather when the ref is distracted. Gangrel with a lariat for 2. Godfather fights back but eats boot on a corner charge. Lariat by Gangrel. Crowd: We want Ho's. Classy. Gangrel with the sleeper. Godfather fights his way up. Powerslam by Godfather. He signals for The Ho Train. Luna distracts Godfather but she accidentally squirts the red liquid into Gangrel's face. Ho Train and Pimpdrop will get the 3 at 4:42. Ho's come down with Godfather to celebrate.
Pretty meh match in all honesty. 3/4*
- We end with a recap of 1999. It would be remiss if I didn't quote this fantastic line from JR: "THE ROCK JUST SHOVED BILLY GUNN'S FACE INTO THAT LARGE WOMAN'S ASS!" Also a nice ten bell salute for Owen Hart at the end of the video as well.
Decent episode. The tag match was fun and I loved the 1999 recap at the end. Next post will be the January 10th edition of RAW. See you then!
Saturday, 28 May 2011
Friday, 27 May 2011
WWF Smackdown - 6/01/00
WWF Smackdown - 06/01/00
- A recap of the WWF title match between The Big Show and Triple H from RAW is shown to start off the show.
- DX and Steph are backstage. Steph is talking about how 3 people couldn't beat The Rock on RAW. She says herself and HHH are taking care of Mick Foley. Xpac takes on Big Show tonight. He isn't happy. Steph puts Mr Ass in a handicap match against The Acolytes. HHH is entering himself into a random drawing to decide his opponent for tonight.
- We get the usual Smackdown opening.
Match #1
The Big Show vs Xpac
Nice pop for Show. Show pulls Pac out of the ring and then...tosses him back in again. OK then. Show is just tossing Pac around like he is nothing. Huge chokebomb by Show. He starts treading on his face. Show pushes the ref and gets DQ'd at 1:08. Naturally the ref gets a chokeslam. Pac tries to use a chair on Show and he just punches the chair into Xpac's face. He grabs Xpac by the throat. Loads of refs come down and Show lets him go. Crowd go apeshit for Show.
Wasn't really a match, but an effective segment. DUD
- Jericho, Chyna and Kat are backstage arguing about being the co-intercontinental champions.
Match #2
Hardcore and Crash Holly vs WWF Co-Intercontinental Champions Chyna and Chris Jericho w/ WWF Women's Champion The Kat
Obviously a follow-up to the Chyna/Holly match from RAW. Sign: Y2Gay. Nice. Hardcore and Y2J start us off. Flying forearm by Y2J. Dropkick by Holly. Crash is tagged in. Crash eats boot on a corner charge. Headscissor attempt is reversed into the Walls but Hardcore breaks it up. Jericho wants a tag but Chyna refuses. Crash tagged in but he gets a double arm backbreaker for his troubles. Hardcore pulls the rope down and Jericho goes over it to the outside. Chyna helps him up but Jericho pushes her away and gets clotheslined and shoved in by Chyna. Hardcore hits the Falcon Arrow and gets the 3 at 2:27. Chyna leaves with the belt and Jericho is throwing a tantrum.
Match was good, high energy throughout. **1/4
- Oh god. Another fake Mankind segment. He is begging people to let him give them autographs and they refuse.
- HHH and Steph are backstage. Tori comes in and wants to use the bathroom? That was random.
- The Acolytes are next.
- Back from the break Road Dogg is with Steph. Steph lets him use the bathroom. Dogg walks in while Tori is using the bathroom. Kane vs Road Dogg later?
Match #3
The Acolytes vs WWF Tag Team Champion Mr Ass
Ass runs in and immediately starts getting destroyed. That Billy Gunn, what a smart man. Ass hits a DDT on Farooq but he just annihilates Ass with a clothesline. Double shoulderblock on Ass. Ass tried a clothesline on Farooq again but Bradshaw hits his Clothesline From Hell. That looked brutal. Nice back suplex/neckbreaker combo by The Acolytes. Road Dogg runs in and low blows Bradshaw for the DQ at 2:04. Dogg tries a Shake Rattle and Roll on Farooq but gets a one armed spinebuster. They fight into the crowd.
Match was basically an extended squash until the run in. That Clothesline From Hell looked awesome though. 1/2*
- Kane is in HHH and Steph's office backstage. He wants a match with Road Dogg. Poor Road Dogg.
- In the office HHH and Steph break the bad news to Road Dogg. If Mr Ass interferes he is fired. Steph claims to have no idea what happened.
Match #4
Kane w/ Tori vs Road Dogg w/ Catchphrases
OH YOU DIDN'T KNOW. Kane goes out and chases Road Dogg. He beats him outside the ring. Kane drapes Dogg's face on the barrier. Dogg goes into the ring and the bell finally rings. Dogg with some punches that have no effect. Kane goes to work in the corner. Dogg into the top turnbuckle. Kane chokes Road Dogg on the top rope. Dogg is just being destroyed. Big vertical suplex by Kane. Back elbow by Kane. Scoop slam and leg drop by Kane. Dogg making the comeback. However he gets booted in the face. Kane hits the clothesline from the top and calls for the chokeslam. Xpac comes down to ringside and distracts Kane. He goes after Pac and Dogg hits him from behind and DDT's him on the ramp. Kane gets shoved into the ring. Shake Rattle and Roll doesn't knock Kane down but a forearm does. Dogg misses the knee drop and gets a huge chokeslam. Kane signals for the Tombstone and that will get the 3 at 5:06.
Basically another extended squash. The Bout pushed the angle well enough though. 1/2*
- The Rock is pacing backstage.
- HHH and Steph are in their office and announce The Rock faces Kurt Angle.
- More fake Mankind bullshit. He is on a boat tour and ranting about how crazy he is to a kid. A fake shark makes him jump and the kids laugh at him.
Match #5
The Rock vs Kurt Angle
Amazing pop for The Great One. He hits the catchphrase. He says last week HHH threw every member of The Rootie Poo Crew at Rock but he came out on top 1....2....3. Rock declares himself The People's Champion. Rock asks the crowd if they see, taste and smell it. If you smell etc. Angle has a mic as he comes out as well. He says he stands before the crowd as an Olympic Champion and a true hero. He says he is still undefeated. He says he has intensity, integrity and intelligence. He says he should be the People's Champion. Rock has the mic back. He says Angle annoyed him. He says he is a true American hero. Rock notices his gold medals. Rock wants Angle to shine up those medals, turn them sideways, stick them up his ass etc. I wrote that before he said it. Bell finally rings and Rock takes him down with a lariat. Angle gets out of the ring to regroup. Rock follows him out and hits another lariat. Suplex on the stage is reversed by Angle and Rock hits hard on the ramp. Rock goes into the steps. Angle taunts in the ring. Big belly-to-belly gets 2. Angle with the stomps in the corner. Rock with a neckbreaker for 2. Angle hits a back suplex. Rock counters a whip into a DDT for a 2. Rock lays the Smackdown in the corner. Samoan Drop gets 2. Steve Blackman runs in and immediately gets nailed by Rock. Rock uses the kendo stick on Blackman and Angle and he is DQ'd at 3:44. Blackman gets a Rockbottom for his troubles. Angle goes nuts in the ring, celebrating as though he won another medal. Rock comes back and hits the spinebuster and The People's Elbow.
Match was fun. **
- HHH and Steph are backstage. HHH is pissed Angle is undefeated.
Match #6
Edge, Christian and Jeff Hardy w/ Terri and Matt Hardy vs Al Snow w/ Head and The Dudley Boyz
This should be good. Christian and Dvon start us off. Christian slams Dvon down and tags in Jeff but Al Snow attacks Jeff. Bubba tags in. Stalling suplex by Bubba is reversed but Bubba whips him into his own corner. Bubba counters a headscissor attempt into a slam. Al Snow runs in again and The Dudleyz hit their headbutt while the ref is distracted. Huge back body drop by Bubba to Jeff. Jeff with a Frankensteiner and in comes Edge with the hot tag. Snow in but he gets dropkicked by Christian. Jeff with a Swanton Bomb over the top to Snow. Edge spears Dvon and Christian hits a reverse DDT to Bubba and Edge hits the Downward Spiral to Dvon for the 3 at 3:09. E&C leave through the crowd. Al Snow attacks the Dudleyz with Head.
Really fun match. I love 6 man tags generally and this one was good. **1/2
- More fake Mankind, this time at Orlando theme park. The workers tell him to leave but he runs off.
Match #7
Test vs WWF Hardcore Champion The Big Bossman
On a depressing note, both of these men are dead. Test refuses a handshake and goes to work. Big rib breaker by Bossman. Bossman just throws him down. Test with a back elbow. Clothesline by Test but he gets poked in the eye and tied in the ropes. Prince Albert comes to ringside. Ref is distracted and Albert attacks Test. Bossman with a knee to the face. He drops him on the barrier outside the ring. Back in, Bossman rubs his forearm on Test's injured nose. Test fights up but eats elbow on a corner charge. Test with a big boot in reply. Test with the DDT for 2. Test eats boot on a corner charge. Test hits a powerslam but Albert is in. He hits Bossman by accident with the scissor kick and Test pins him for the 3 at 4:04. Technically Bossman should have won by DQ but oh well. Albert and Bossman argue afterwards.
Match was OK, nothing special. But then, it's the Bossman and Test so it was never going to be. *1/2
- HHH and Steph again backstage. HHH is saying Test winning was an upset. Steph tells him to make sure he wins tonight.
- More fake Mankind. Urgh. ENOUGH. He goes on the Back To The Future ride.
Match #8
The Mean Street Posse w/ No talent vs Kaientai
Posses attack before the bell. Taka hits a moonsault to the outside. Funaki locks in a chinlock to Joey Abs and Taka hits a dropkick to the face. Funaki gets his feet up on a corner charge but gets slammed off the top by Abs. Abs with a decent suplex and a gutwrench suplex for 2. Rodney tagged in with a scoop slam. Abs tagged back in. Good sit out powerbomb by Abs. Pete Gas tagged in. Gas Mask gets a 2. Rodney misses a top rope move and hits Gas. Taka comes in with a missile dropkick out of nowhere and Funaki rolls him up for 3 at 3:02. God the Posse sucked. Joey Abs was passable though.
Match was passable. *
- HHH and Steph backstage. We find out HHH's opponent next.
- Steph gets the wrestlers attention backstage. She tells them someone in that room will face HHH tonight for the title. She talks him up as having pride and spirit. She introduces HHH to them. He tells them he is proud to be champion. Headbanger Mosh is wearing the weirdest outfit I have ever seen. Steph draws out the random pick. It is.....Andre The Giant. They pick another one. This time it's The Fabulous Moolah. HHH decides to make Howard Finkel draw but he stumbles and knocks the barrow over. He picks one up off the floor. It is Rikishi. HHH is not happy. Rikishi vs HHH is next!
- Fake Mankind is outside. The real Mankind confronts him and beats the shit out of the fake one. I'm glad that shit had a payoff anyway.
Match #9
Rikishi vs WWF Champion Triple H w/ Stephanie Mcmahon Helmsley
Rikishi was OVER. Holy shit. Too Cool are told to go backstage by Rikishi, he wants to do this alone. Stephanie is doing commentary for this match. HHH attacks before the bell and works over Rikishi in the corner. 'Kish fires back with uppercuts. Big back body drop by Rikishi. HHH goes into the steps outside the ring. 'Kish with an Oklahoma slam and leg drop on the floor. 'Kish gets sent into the steps. 'Kish gets his head slammed into the table. Back in, Rikishi fires back with some rights. HHH hits the facebuster for 2. Clothesline sends Rikishi somersaulting to the mat for 2. I love Rikishi's oversell of the clohtesline. HHH sends him into the barrier. Rikishi does the same and then hits a lariat. HHH tossed back in. Rikishi hits the ass charge and a Samoan Drop for 2. Belly-to-belly suplex by Rikishi. He signals for the Banzai Drop and hits it. HHH somehow kicks out at 2. Rikishi Driver attempt is reversed. Pedigree is also reversed to a great pop. Huge superkick by Rikishi gets 2. Crowd are great here. Rikishi misses a standing Banzai Drop. Steph tosses in a chair to Rikishi and distracts the ref. Chairshot to the head only gets 2. HHH goes apeshit at the ref. HHH has the WWF title and hits Rikishi for the DQ at 7:11. Rikishi gets back up and HHH gets a chair. Chair to the back knocks him down. 'kish gets up again and HHH gets the hell out of dodge.
Match was really fun. I enjoyed it. **1/2
- Too Cool run back in and they dance to celebrate. Rikishi is getting amazing cheers from the crowd.
Good show, 9 matches in 2 hours is good and plenty of good stuff involving the likes of Edge and Christian and Rikishi. I wish the 6-man tag got more time and the fake Mankind segments weren't so plentiful, but at least the pay off was there. Keep an eye out for the next show, which will be the January 9th edition of Sunday Night HEAT. See you then!
- A recap of the WWF title match between The Big Show and Triple H from RAW is shown to start off the show.
- DX and Steph are backstage. Steph is talking about how 3 people couldn't beat The Rock on RAW. She says herself and HHH are taking care of Mick Foley. Xpac takes on Big Show tonight. He isn't happy. Steph puts Mr Ass in a handicap match against The Acolytes. HHH is entering himself into a random drawing to decide his opponent for tonight.
- We get the usual Smackdown opening.
Match #1
The Big Show vs Xpac
Nice pop for Show. Show pulls Pac out of the ring and then...tosses him back in again. OK then. Show is just tossing Pac around like he is nothing. Huge chokebomb by Show. He starts treading on his face. Show pushes the ref and gets DQ'd at 1:08. Naturally the ref gets a chokeslam. Pac tries to use a chair on Show and he just punches the chair into Xpac's face. He grabs Xpac by the throat. Loads of refs come down and Show lets him go. Crowd go apeshit for Show.
Wasn't really a match, but an effective segment. DUD
- Jericho, Chyna and Kat are backstage arguing about being the co-intercontinental champions.
Match #2
Hardcore and Crash Holly vs WWF Co-Intercontinental Champions Chyna and Chris Jericho w/ WWF Women's Champion The Kat
Obviously a follow-up to the Chyna/Holly match from RAW. Sign: Y2Gay. Nice. Hardcore and Y2J start us off. Flying forearm by Y2J. Dropkick by Holly. Crash is tagged in. Crash eats boot on a corner charge. Headscissor attempt is reversed into the Walls but Hardcore breaks it up. Jericho wants a tag but Chyna refuses. Crash tagged in but he gets a double arm backbreaker for his troubles. Hardcore pulls the rope down and Jericho goes over it to the outside. Chyna helps him up but Jericho pushes her away and gets clotheslined and shoved in by Chyna. Hardcore hits the Falcon Arrow and gets the 3 at 2:27. Chyna leaves with the belt and Jericho is throwing a tantrum.
Match was good, high energy throughout. **1/4
- Oh god. Another fake Mankind segment. He is begging people to let him give them autographs and they refuse.
- HHH and Steph are backstage. Tori comes in and wants to use the bathroom? That was random.
- The Acolytes are next.
- Back from the break Road Dogg is with Steph. Steph lets him use the bathroom. Dogg walks in while Tori is using the bathroom. Kane vs Road Dogg later?
Match #3
The Acolytes vs WWF Tag Team Champion Mr Ass
Ass runs in and immediately starts getting destroyed. That Billy Gunn, what a smart man. Ass hits a DDT on Farooq but he just annihilates Ass with a clothesline. Double shoulderblock on Ass. Ass tried a clothesline on Farooq again but Bradshaw hits his Clothesline From Hell. That looked brutal. Nice back suplex/neckbreaker combo by The Acolytes. Road Dogg runs in and low blows Bradshaw for the DQ at 2:04. Dogg tries a Shake Rattle and Roll on Farooq but gets a one armed spinebuster. They fight into the crowd.
Match was basically an extended squash until the run in. That Clothesline From Hell looked awesome though. 1/2*
- Kane is in HHH and Steph's office backstage. He wants a match with Road Dogg. Poor Road Dogg.
- In the office HHH and Steph break the bad news to Road Dogg. If Mr Ass interferes he is fired. Steph claims to have no idea what happened.
Match #4
Kane w/ Tori vs Road Dogg w/ Catchphrases
OH YOU DIDN'T KNOW. Kane goes out and chases Road Dogg. He beats him outside the ring. Kane drapes Dogg's face on the barrier. Dogg goes into the ring and the bell finally rings. Dogg with some punches that have no effect. Kane goes to work in the corner. Dogg into the top turnbuckle. Kane chokes Road Dogg on the top rope. Dogg is just being destroyed. Big vertical suplex by Kane. Back elbow by Kane. Scoop slam and leg drop by Kane. Dogg making the comeback. However he gets booted in the face. Kane hits the clothesline from the top and calls for the chokeslam. Xpac comes down to ringside and distracts Kane. He goes after Pac and Dogg hits him from behind and DDT's him on the ramp. Kane gets shoved into the ring. Shake Rattle and Roll doesn't knock Kane down but a forearm does. Dogg misses the knee drop and gets a huge chokeslam. Kane signals for the Tombstone and that will get the 3 at 5:06.
Basically another extended squash. The Bout pushed the angle well enough though. 1/2*
- The Rock is pacing backstage.
- HHH and Steph are in their office and announce The Rock faces Kurt Angle.
- More fake Mankind bullshit. He is on a boat tour and ranting about how crazy he is to a kid. A fake shark makes him jump and the kids laugh at him.
Match #5
The Rock vs Kurt Angle
Amazing pop for The Great One. He hits the catchphrase. He says last week HHH threw every member of The Rootie Poo Crew at Rock but he came out on top 1....2....3. Rock declares himself The People's Champion. Rock asks the crowd if they see, taste and smell it. If you smell etc. Angle has a mic as he comes out as well. He says he stands before the crowd as an Olympic Champion and a true hero. He says he is still undefeated. He says he has intensity, integrity and intelligence. He says he should be the People's Champion. Rock has the mic back. He says Angle annoyed him. He says he is a true American hero. Rock notices his gold medals. Rock wants Angle to shine up those medals, turn them sideways, stick them up his ass etc. I wrote that before he said it. Bell finally rings and Rock takes him down with a lariat. Angle gets out of the ring to regroup. Rock follows him out and hits another lariat. Suplex on the stage is reversed by Angle and Rock hits hard on the ramp. Rock goes into the steps. Angle taunts in the ring. Big belly-to-belly gets 2. Angle with the stomps in the corner. Rock with a neckbreaker for 2. Angle hits a back suplex. Rock counters a whip into a DDT for a 2. Rock lays the Smackdown in the corner. Samoan Drop gets 2. Steve Blackman runs in and immediately gets nailed by Rock. Rock uses the kendo stick on Blackman and Angle and he is DQ'd at 3:44. Blackman gets a Rockbottom for his troubles. Angle goes nuts in the ring, celebrating as though he won another medal. Rock comes back and hits the spinebuster and The People's Elbow.
Match was fun. **
- HHH and Steph are backstage. HHH is pissed Angle is undefeated.
Match #6
Edge, Christian and Jeff Hardy w/ Terri and Matt Hardy vs Al Snow w/ Head and The Dudley Boyz
This should be good. Christian and Dvon start us off. Christian slams Dvon down and tags in Jeff but Al Snow attacks Jeff. Bubba tags in. Stalling suplex by Bubba is reversed but Bubba whips him into his own corner. Bubba counters a headscissor attempt into a slam. Al Snow runs in again and The Dudleyz hit their headbutt while the ref is distracted. Huge back body drop by Bubba to Jeff. Jeff with a Frankensteiner and in comes Edge with the hot tag. Snow in but he gets dropkicked by Christian. Jeff with a Swanton Bomb over the top to Snow. Edge spears Dvon and Christian hits a reverse DDT to Bubba and Edge hits the Downward Spiral to Dvon for the 3 at 3:09. E&C leave through the crowd. Al Snow attacks the Dudleyz with Head.
Really fun match. I love 6 man tags generally and this one was good. **1/2
- More fake Mankind, this time at Orlando theme park. The workers tell him to leave but he runs off.
Match #7
Test vs WWF Hardcore Champion The Big Bossman
On a depressing note, both of these men are dead. Test refuses a handshake and goes to work. Big rib breaker by Bossman. Bossman just throws him down. Test with a back elbow. Clothesline by Test but he gets poked in the eye and tied in the ropes. Prince Albert comes to ringside. Ref is distracted and Albert attacks Test. Bossman with a knee to the face. He drops him on the barrier outside the ring. Back in, Bossman rubs his forearm on Test's injured nose. Test fights up but eats elbow on a corner charge. Test with a big boot in reply. Test with the DDT for 2. Test eats boot on a corner charge. Test hits a powerslam but Albert is in. He hits Bossman by accident with the scissor kick and Test pins him for the 3 at 4:04. Technically Bossman should have won by DQ but oh well. Albert and Bossman argue afterwards.
Match was OK, nothing special. But then, it's the Bossman and Test so it was never going to be. *1/2
- HHH and Steph again backstage. HHH is saying Test winning was an upset. Steph tells him to make sure he wins tonight.
- More fake Mankind. Urgh. ENOUGH. He goes on the Back To The Future ride.
Match #8
The Mean Street Posse w/ No talent vs Kaientai
Posses attack before the bell. Taka hits a moonsault to the outside. Funaki locks in a chinlock to Joey Abs and Taka hits a dropkick to the face. Funaki gets his feet up on a corner charge but gets slammed off the top by Abs. Abs with a decent suplex and a gutwrench suplex for 2. Rodney tagged in with a scoop slam. Abs tagged back in. Good sit out powerbomb by Abs. Pete Gas tagged in. Gas Mask gets a 2. Rodney misses a top rope move and hits Gas. Taka comes in with a missile dropkick out of nowhere and Funaki rolls him up for 3 at 3:02. God the Posse sucked. Joey Abs was passable though.
Match was passable. *
- HHH and Steph backstage. We find out HHH's opponent next.
- Steph gets the wrestlers attention backstage. She tells them someone in that room will face HHH tonight for the title. She talks him up as having pride and spirit. She introduces HHH to them. He tells them he is proud to be champion. Headbanger Mosh is wearing the weirdest outfit I have ever seen. Steph draws out the random pick. It is.....Andre The Giant. They pick another one. This time it's The Fabulous Moolah. HHH decides to make Howard Finkel draw but he stumbles and knocks the barrow over. He picks one up off the floor. It is Rikishi. HHH is not happy. Rikishi vs HHH is next!
- Fake Mankind is outside. The real Mankind confronts him and beats the shit out of the fake one. I'm glad that shit had a payoff anyway.
Match #9
Rikishi vs WWF Champion Triple H w/ Stephanie Mcmahon Helmsley
Rikishi was OVER. Holy shit. Too Cool are told to go backstage by Rikishi, he wants to do this alone. Stephanie is doing commentary for this match. HHH attacks before the bell and works over Rikishi in the corner. 'Kish fires back with uppercuts. Big back body drop by Rikishi. HHH goes into the steps outside the ring. 'Kish with an Oklahoma slam and leg drop on the floor. 'Kish gets sent into the steps. 'Kish gets his head slammed into the table. Back in, Rikishi fires back with some rights. HHH hits the facebuster for 2. Clothesline sends Rikishi somersaulting to the mat for 2. I love Rikishi's oversell of the clohtesline. HHH sends him into the barrier. Rikishi does the same and then hits a lariat. HHH tossed back in. Rikishi hits the ass charge and a Samoan Drop for 2. Belly-to-belly suplex by Rikishi. He signals for the Banzai Drop and hits it. HHH somehow kicks out at 2. Rikishi Driver attempt is reversed. Pedigree is also reversed to a great pop. Huge superkick by Rikishi gets 2. Crowd are great here. Rikishi misses a standing Banzai Drop. Steph tosses in a chair to Rikishi and distracts the ref. Chairshot to the head only gets 2. HHH goes apeshit at the ref. HHH has the WWF title and hits Rikishi for the DQ at 7:11. Rikishi gets back up and HHH gets a chair. Chair to the back knocks him down. 'kish gets up again and HHH gets the hell out of dodge.
Match was really fun. I enjoyed it. **1/2
- Too Cool run back in and they dance to celebrate. Rikishi is getting amazing cheers from the crowd.
Good show, 9 matches in 2 hours is good and plenty of good stuff involving the likes of Edge and Christian and Rikishi. I wish the 6-man tag got more time and the fake Mankind segments weren't so plentiful, but at least the pay off was there. Keep an eye out for the next show, which will be the January 9th edition of Sunday Night HEAT. See you then!
Thursday, 26 May 2011
WWF RAW is WAR Recap - 03/01/00
Yes, I know I haven't made a post in 4 months. Therefore I decided to try my hand at recapping wrestling shows. Therefore why not start with my favourite year in wrestling, 2000?
WWF RAW is WAR - January 3rd, 2000
- Usual RAW opening to start.
- RAW is live from The Rock's hometown, Miami Florida. Speaking of The Rock, he comes down to the ring to a huge pop.
- Looks like he stole Disco Inferno's suit.
- He begins his promo with the usual. He name drops the Miami Dolphins to huge boo's.
- Rock says his family are the millions (and millions) of his fans.
- Rock says he has 1 new years resolution: He will be the best WWF champion ever.
- He says he has one issue: Mick Foley.
- Rock says the way Foley was fired stunk of monkey crap.
- "Speaking of monkey crap.....HHH...."
- Rock calls him out. Rock says The Brahma Bull wants to stick his horns up HHH's candy ass.
- HHH's music hits and he comes out on stage with Stephanie. Huge heat for Trips here.
- Aaaaand the asshole chant. God I miss that chant.
- HHH says he passed an old lady in the back and she says she wants her jacket back from Rock.
- He says he would love to kick the Rock's ass in front of his fans, but he has bigger fish to fry.
- HHH has made his own resolution: He will challenge The Big Show tonight for the WWF title.
- HHH puts Rock in a handicap "you're fired" match, and Rock will be fired if he loses. To make it "fair", anyone interfering will be fired on the spot.
- Rock wants to know his opponents. Of course, he immediately interrupts HHH with the trademark "IT DOESN'T MATTER".
- HHH brings out Rock's opponents: X-Pac, Road Dogg and Mr Ass, who beat down Rock in the ring.
- HHH says Rock will get his ass kicked and fired tonight.
- We recap DX beating down Rock from moments ago.
Match #1
Too Cool w/ Rikishi vs The Dudley Boyz
Before the match the Mean Street Posse come down in their stupid sweater vests to watch the match. Sexay and Dvon start. Sexay hits a full nelson facebuster and tags in Scotty. They hit the synchronized elbows. Scotty with a bulldog and he hits The Worm. Dvon drops Scotty on the top rope and tags in Bubba. Big back body drop on Scotty. Dvon tags in and they hit a double shoulderblock. Scotty hits a boot in the corner and hits a shoulderblock from the second rope. Hot tag to Sexay and he builds momentum. Nice double DDT on the Dudleyz. The Posse run down and assault Rikishi before being run off by the Acolytes. In the ring, Bubba powerbombs Sexay and they go for the headbutt before Scotty pushes Dvon off. Rikishi superkicks Bubba for the DQ after 3:16. Rikishi hits his Rikishi Driver post match on Bubba. Too Cool dance afterwards. Just because.
Just a standard TV match. *1/4
- Interview backstage with Michael Cole and The Acolytes. They talk about kicking ass and say nothing of note.
- Backstage with HHH and Steph. Steve Blackman with his Kendo Stick walks in. HHH says if he hits Kane tonight he is fired. Steph wonders why he needed to say that, and HHH says Kane faces Angle tonight and that he wants to end Angle's winning streak.
Match #2
Kane w/ Tori vs Kurt Angle
This was during the whole "Tori is manipulating Kane" angle. Angle cuts a promo on the ramp. He tells his fans not to worry about him losing his streak, because Kane lacks integrity and intelligence. By Angle's logic, he has all 3 I's and is therefore the favourite. Kane goes out to meet Angle and it's on. He tosses Angle back in and hits a big boot. He works him over in the corner with punches and sends him into the corner. Angle runs out of the corner straight into a lariat. Kane tosses Angle outside and drops him onto the railing. Kane goes up top and hits his clothesline. Angle dodges a corner charge and attempts to punch Kane in the corner. He just pushes Angle away but misses an elbow. Dropkick to the knee and Kurt goes up top. He gets caught by the throat and gets Chokeslammed. Blackman comes to ringside and hits Angle for the DQ at 2:26. Kane is PISSED.
Match was fine, weird finish though. *
- Backstage with HHH and Steph again. Steph hints she has a plan for the Intercontinental title match later.
- We come back from break with Steph coming to ringside.
- Steph says they have a dilemma with the IC title situation.
- They show footage from Smackdown that shows a double pin situation. One ref said Chyna won, one said Jericho won.
- Steph calls out Chyna and she comes to the ring with the Women's Champion The Kat (who was banging The King at the time. Good old Jerry.)
- Steph then calls Y2J down to a good pop.
- Steph says her decision is that Jericho and Chyna are now Co-Intercontinental Champions. She explains that only one of them can defend the belt and they both lose the title if that person loses.
- Steph advises them to get along.
Match #3
Chyna vs Hardcore Holly w/ Crash
Y2J is doing commentary. Awesome. They lockup and Chyna hits some punches and kicks in the corner. She hits the handspring elbow and a DDT for 2. Jericho is ranting about conspiracies. Holly hits a huge dropkick right in Chyna's face. Holly clotheslines Chyna to the outside. Y2J is yelling at Chyna as loud as possible. Chyna tried a sunset flip and Holly reversed into a pin but the ref was distracted. Y2J cheap shots Holly and Chyna pins him for a 3 in 1:56. Jericho takes the belt with him and is shouting he never lost it. Chyna tails after him. Hardcore for some reason starts beating the shit out of Crash. I guess he really is HARDCOREZ!!!111
Match was nothing really. 1/2*
- Backstage with HHH and Steph, along with Albert and The Bossman. He tells them they will wrestle Test and 2 partners later on.
- JR and King ramble about the title match later.
- Recapping last weeks RAW and the match between Show and HHH. Foley interfered and cost HHH the match. HHH then set up a handicap match with Show vs DX. They pretty much destroyed him.
- Show is interviewed by Cole. Well, kinda, Show just shoves him away and keeps walking.
Match #4
WWF Champion The Big Show vs Triple H w/ DX and Stephanie McMahon Helmsley
Big Show comes out first for some reason. DX and Steph are all on the ramp. Show brings him in from the apron and immediately goes on the attack. HHH tries to fight back but gets headbutted. And another. And a third. Big scoop slam and an elbow for 2. HHH sucks him in and goes on the offensive with punches. Show whips HHH into the corner and he goes flying over the rope. ANOTHER headbutt on the outside. Show gets shoved over the safety rail after HHH wiggled out of a powerslam attempt. Show throws HHH over the rail but gets reversed on a whip attempt into the steps. Show goes into them hard. HHH breaks the count and knocks Show over the announce table from the apron. HHH throws him into the ring bell twice. Show gets shoved back into the ring. Facebuster and high knee gets 2 for HHH before Show kicks out with AUTHORITAH! Show begins no selling HHH and nails another headbutt. Big sidewalk slam gets a 2. Nice powerslam for 2. Show hits a chokeslam but HHH is in the ropes. Show goes up top(!) but misses an elbow drop. Pedigree attempt is reversed. Xpac distracts the ref and HHH hits a low blow into the Pedigree. HHH is your new WWF Champion at 7:07.
Match was about as good as a Big Show/HHH TV match was going to be. Although Show really needed to hit less headbutts. **
Cue overblown pyro celebration, complete with DX balloons.
- Recap of the Mankind/Rock match from last week where Mankind was "fired".
Match #5
Test, The Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young w/ Mark Henry and Harvey Wippleman vs Prince Albert and The Big Bossman
Basically a handicap match then. Test knocks down Albert and goes to work on the Bossman. Oh god. Mae Young hits a bronco buster on Bossman. Albert proceeds to stomp the shit out of her. Test attempts a fightback and powerslams Albert. He goes up top but Bossman hits him with the nightstick. Albert hits a scissor kick for 3 at 1:02.
Well, that match had a point. DUD
Mark Henry tries to attack Bossman and Albert but he gets ambushed. Test comes in with a double clothesline and they scarper. Moolah carries away Harvey Whippleman.
- DX and HHH celebrate backstage whilst Show is seen leaving the arena.
Match #6
The Acolytes vs The Mean Street Posse
Posse attack before the bell. They brawl for a while but The Dudleyz run in for the DQ at 0:31. The Posse and The Dudleyz beat down the Acolytes, complete with Dvon headbutting Farooq right in the Gentleman's Area.
Not even a match. Nice chairshot by Bubba though. DUD
- More DX celebration.
- Some weird movie is played called "Have A Bad Day". Basically it shows "Mankind" at an unemployment office. HHH is wearing a rubber nose (pff, like he needed it) and insulting him. That was it.
Match #7 - Steel Cage Match
Jeff Hardy w/ Terri and Matt Hardy vs Al Snow w/ Head
Random cage match is random. Snow immediately slams Jeff's head into the door. Snow uses a chair outside the cage before tossing him and Terri into the cage and locking the door. Hardy hits a Whisper In The Wind from the top rope and his leg drop to the groin. Snow attacks Hardy whilst he was trying to break the lock. Terri is feeling "nippy" tonight :). Snow tosses Hardy into the cage a few times and hits a scoop slam. He goes to Pillmanize Jeff but Terri stops him. Jeff dropkicks the chair into Al's face. Jeff goes to climb out. Snow pulls him down and hits almost a modified stunner from the top of the cage. Looked awesome. Snow drops Jeff from a powerbomb position and rams the chair into Jeff. Again into the cage. Spinning heel kick by Jeff. They trade punches and Jeff hits a back body drop. Jeff attempts to escape but Snow stops him. Jeff goes headfirst into the cage like a Lawn dart. Jeff reverses a second attempt and springboards off Snow's back to escape at 6:47. Terri is stuck in the cage with Snow after the match. Matt Hardy makes the save with the chair. The crowd boo, must be lots of rednecks in attendance tonight.
Match was decent, nothing more, nothing less. **
- Part 2 of Have A Bad Day. Urgh. Mankind is now at a children's hospital trying to entertain kids. HHH is playing a doctor called "Hung Lo". Oh penis jokes. Now they are having a Karate fight. "Hung Lo" beats him up.
- Patterson and Brisco are backstage with The Rock. They pretty much are convinced Rock is fired. Cue a typical Rock rant, complete with "rootie poo candy ass" and "Jabroni".
- HHH gives DX a pep talk.
- OH CHRIST. PART 3 OF THAT FUCKING MOVIE. KILL ME.
- Mankind is at a book signing and no one is there. HHH is now "B Dawg". Mankind is attacked by "B Dawg". NO MORE FUCKING MOVIE.
- More DX dick rubbing backstage. They say nothing of note until Rock runs in, clotheslines Road Dogg and runs off.
Match #8
Xpac and WWF Tag Team Champions The New Age Outlaws w/ Triple H and Stephanie McMahon Helmsley vs The Rock
HHH "forgot" to mention this is No-DQ. Rock is rolling until Mr Ass hits a Lariat. DX work over Rock on the outside. Crowd: Xpac sucks. Yep, he really does. Rock reverses a whip attempt and sends Dogg into the steps. He rams Xpac straight into the ring post but Mr Ass gets a drop toe hold. Ass drops him onto the barrier. HHH is in a leather chair on the entrance ramp. Back in the ring, Dogg is knocked down but Xpac hits a spinning heel kick for 2. The beatdown continues. Nothing but stomps and punches here folks. Dogg tries a suplex on the outside but Rock reverses. Xpac continues the beatdown on the outside. Rock fights back for a moment but Mr Ass quickly stops him and sends him over the announce table. JR is going apeshit about how unfair it is. Dogg throws him back into the ring. More punching in the corner. Rock comes out of the corner with clotheslines and DDT's Mr Ass. Samoan Drop for Xpac and spinebuster for Dogg. Rock hits The People's Elbow but Ass pulls the ref out of the ring. Kick by Xpac. Again. Learn some wrestling ffs Sean Waltman you greasy haired shit. Mr Ass hits a jackhammer. Goldberg: GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT. Bronco Buster by Xpac. Dogg gets a chair but Mick Foley comes out of nowhere and cleans house. HHH comes in and gets DESTROYED by a chairshot. Foley disappears into the crowd. Rockbottom for Mr Ass will get the 3 in 9:15.
Dragged a little but the comeback was well timed and the Foley interference was well done. I liked it. **1/4.
Decent show all in all. Some good angle development and a few solid matches. Plus a WWF title change. Can't complain. Although way too much HHH stuff and that movie was just bizarre. Keep an eye out for my next post, which will be the January 6th edition of Smackdown. See you then!
WWF RAW is WAR - January 3rd, 2000
- Usual RAW opening to start.
- RAW is live from The Rock's hometown, Miami Florida. Speaking of The Rock, he comes down to the ring to a huge pop.
- Looks like he stole Disco Inferno's suit.
- He begins his promo with the usual. He name drops the Miami Dolphins to huge boo's.
- Rock says his family are the millions (and millions) of his fans.
- Rock says he has 1 new years resolution: He will be the best WWF champion ever.
- He says he has one issue: Mick Foley.
- Rock says the way Foley was fired stunk of monkey crap.
- "Speaking of monkey crap.....HHH...."
- Rock calls him out. Rock says The Brahma Bull wants to stick his horns up HHH's candy ass.
- HHH's music hits and he comes out on stage with Stephanie. Huge heat for Trips here.
- Aaaaand the asshole chant. God I miss that chant.
- HHH says he passed an old lady in the back and she says she wants her jacket back from Rock.
- He says he would love to kick the Rock's ass in front of his fans, but he has bigger fish to fry.
- HHH has made his own resolution: He will challenge The Big Show tonight for the WWF title.
- HHH puts Rock in a handicap "you're fired" match, and Rock will be fired if he loses. To make it "fair", anyone interfering will be fired on the spot.
- Rock wants to know his opponents. Of course, he immediately interrupts HHH with the trademark "IT DOESN'T MATTER".
- HHH brings out Rock's opponents: X-Pac, Road Dogg and Mr Ass, who beat down Rock in the ring.
- HHH says Rock will get his ass kicked and fired tonight.
- We recap DX beating down Rock from moments ago.
Match #1
Too Cool w/ Rikishi vs The Dudley Boyz
Before the match the Mean Street Posse come down in their stupid sweater vests to watch the match. Sexay and Dvon start. Sexay hits a full nelson facebuster and tags in Scotty. They hit the synchronized elbows. Scotty with a bulldog and he hits The Worm. Dvon drops Scotty on the top rope and tags in Bubba. Big back body drop on Scotty. Dvon tags in and they hit a double shoulderblock. Scotty hits a boot in the corner and hits a shoulderblock from the second rope. Hot tag to Sexay and he builds momentum. Nice double DDT on the Dudleyz. The Posse run down and assault Rikishi before being run off by the Acolytes. In the ring, Bubba powerbombs Sexay and they go for the headbutt before Scotty pushes Dvon off. Rikishi superkicks Bubba for the DQ after 3:16. Rikishi hits his Rikishi Driver post match on Bubba. Too Cool dance afterwards. Just because.
Just a standard TV match. *1/4
- Interview backstage with Michael Cole and The Acolytes. They talk about kicking ass and say nothing of note.
- Backstage with HHH and Steph. Steve Blackman with his Kendo Stick walks in. HHH says if he hits Kane tonight he is fired. Steph wonders why he needed to say that, and HHH says Kane faces Angle tonight and that he wants to end Angle's winning streak.
Match #2
Kane w/ Tori vs Kurt Angle
This was during the whole "Tori is manipulating Kane" angle. Angle cuts a promo on the ramp. He tells his fans not to worry about him losing his streak, because Kane lacks integrity and intelligence. By Angle's logic, he has all 3 I's and is therefore the favourite. Kane goes out to meet Angle and it's on. He tosses Angle back in and hits a big boot. He works him over in the corner with punches and sends him into the corner. Angle runs out of the corner straight into a lariat. Kane tosses Angle outside and drops him onto the railing. Kane goes up top and hits his clothesline. Angle dodges a corner charge and attempts to punch Kane in the corner. He just pushes Angle away but misses an elbow. Dropkick to the knee and Kurt goes up top. He gets caught by the throat and gets Chokeslammed. Blackman comes to ringside and hits Angle for the DQ at 2:26. Kane is PISSED.
Match was fine, weird finish though. *
- Backstage with HHH and Steph again. Steph hints she has a plan for the Intercontinental title match later.
- We come back from break with Steph coming to ringside.
- Steph says they have a dilemma with the IC title situation.
- They show footage from Smackdown that shows a double pin situation. One ref said Chyna won, one said Jericho won.
- Steph calls out Chyna and she comes to the ring with the Women's Champion The Kat (who was banging The King at the time. Good old Jerry.)
- Steph then calls Y2J down to a good pop.
- Steph says her decision is that Jericho and Chyna are now Co-Intercontinental Champions. She explains that only one of them can defend the belt and they both lose the title if that person loses.
- Steph advises them to get along.
Match #3
Chyna vs Hardcore Holly w/ Crash
Y2J is doing commentary. Awesome. They lockup and Chyna hits some punches and kicks in the corner. She hits the handspring elbow and a DDT for 2. Jericho is ranting about conspiracies. Holly hits a huge dropkick right in Chyna's face. Holly clotheslines Chyna to the outside. Y2J is yelling at Chyna as loud as possible. Chyna tried a sunset flip and Holly reversed into a pin but the ref was distracted. Y2J cheap shots Holly and Chyna pins him for a 3 in 1:56. Jericho takes the belt with him and is shouting he never lost it. Chyna tails after him. Hardcore for some reason starts beating the shit out of Crash. I guess he really is HARDCOREZ!!!111
Match was nothing really. 1/2*
- Backstage with HHH and Steph, along with Albert and The Bossman. He tells them they will wrestle Test and 2 partners later on.
- JR and King ramble about the title match later.
- Recapping last weeks RAW and the match between Show and HHH. Foley interfered and cost HHH the match. HHH then set up a handicap match with Show vs DX. They pretty much destroyed him.
- Show is interviewed by Cole. Well, kinda, Show just shoves him away and keeps walking.
Match #4
WWF Champion The Big Show vs Triple H w/ DX and Stephanie McMahon Helmsley
Big Show comes out first for some reason. DX and Steph are all on the ramp. Show brings him in from the apron and immediately goes on the attack. HHH tries to fight back but gets headbutted. And another. And a third. Big scoop slam and an elbow for 2. HHH sucks him in and goes on the offensive with punches. Show whips HHH into the corner and he goes flying over the rope. ANOTHER headbutt on the outside. Show gets shoved over the safety rail after HHH wiggled out of a powerslam attempt. Show throws HHH over the rail but gets reversed on a whip attempt into the steps. Show goes into them hard. HHH breaks the count and knocks Show over the announce table from the apron. HHH throws him into the ring bell twice. Show gets shoved back into the ring. Facebuster and high knee gets 2 for HHH before Show kicks out with AUTHORITAH! Show begins no selling HHH and nails another headbutt. Big sidewalk slam gets a 2. Nice powerslam for 2. Show hits a chokeslam but HHH is in the ropes. Show goes up top(!) but misses an elbow drop. Pedigree attempt is reversed. Xpac distracts the ref and HHH hits a low blow into the Pedigree. HHH is your new WWF Champion at 7:07.
Match was about as good as a Big Show/HHH TV match was going to be. Although Show really needed to hit less headbutts. **
Cue overblown pyro celebration, complete with DX balloons.
- Recap of the Mankind/Rock match from last week where Mankind was "fired".
Match #5
Test, The Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young w/ Mark Henry and Harvey Wippleman vs Prince Albert and The Big Bossman
Basically a handicap match then. Test knocks down Albert and goes to work on the Bossman. Oh god. Mae Young hits a bronco buster on Bossman. Albert proceeds to stomp the shit out of her. Test attempts a fightback and powerslams Albert. He goes up top but Bossman hits him with the nightstick. Albert hits a scissor kick for 3 at 1:02.
Well, that match had a point. DUD
Mark Henry tries to attack Bossman and Albert but he gets ambushed. Test comes in with a double clothesline and they scarper. Moolah carries away Harvey Whippleman.
- DX and HHH celebrate backstage whilst Show is seen leaving the arena.
Match #6
The Acolytes vs The Mean Street Posse
Posse attack before the bell. They brawl for a while but The Dudleyz run in for the DQ at 0:31. The Posse and The Dudleyz beat down the Acolytes, complete with Dvon headbutting Farooq right in the Gentleman's Area.
Not even a match. Nice chairshot by Bubba though. DUD
- More DX celebration.
- Some weird movie is played called "Have A Bad Day". Basically it shows "Mankind" at an unemployment office. HHH is wearing a rubber nose (pff, like he needed it) and insulting him. That was it.
Match #7 - Steel Cage Match
Jeff Hardy w/ Terri and Matt Hardy vs Al Snow w/ Head
Random cage match is random. Snow immediately slams Jeff's head into the door. Snow uses a chair outside the cage before tossing him and Terri into the cage and locking the door. Hardy hits a Whisper In The Wind from the top rope and his leg drop to the groin. Snow attacks Hardy whilst he was trying to break the lock. Terri is feeling "nippy" tonight :). Snow tosses Hardy into the cage a few times and hits a scoop slam. He goes to Pillmanize Jeff but Terri stops him. Jeff dropkicks the chair into Al's face. Jeff goes to climb out. Snow pulls him down and hits almost a modified stunner from the top of the cage. Looked awesome. Snow drops Jeff from a powerbomb position and rams the chair into Jeff. Again into the cage. Spinning heel kick by Jeff. They trade punches and Jeff hits a back body drop. Jeff attempts to escape but Snow stops him. Jeff goes headfirst into the cage like a Lawn dart. Jeff reverses a second attempt and springboards off Snow's back to escape at 6:47. Terri is stuck in the cage with Snow after the match. Matt Hardy makes the save with the chair. The crowd boo, must be lots of rednecks in attendance tonight.
Match was decent, nothing more, nothing less. **
- Part 2 of Have A Bad Day. Urgh. Mankind is now at a children's hospital trying to entertain kids. HHH is playing a doctor called "Hung Lo". Oh penis jokes. Now they are having a Karate fight. "Hung Lo" beats him up.
- Patterson and Brisco are backstage with The Rock. They pretty much are convinced Rock is fired. Cue a typical Rock rant, complete with "rootie poo candy ass" and "Jabroni".
- HHH gives DX a pep talk.
- OH CHRIST. PART 3 OF THAT FUCKING MOVIE. KILL ME.
- Mankind is at a book signing and no one is there. HHH is now "B Dawg". Mankind is attacked by "B Dawg". NO MORE FUCKING MOVIE.
- More DX dick rubbing backstage. They say nothing of note until Rock runs in, clotheslines Road Dogg and runs off.
Match #8
Xpac and WWF Tag Team Champions The New Age Outlaws w/ Triple H and Stephanie McMahon Helmsley vs The Rock
HHH "forgot" to mention this is No-DQ. Rock is rolling until Mr Ass hits a Lariat. DX work over Rock on the outside. Crowd: Xpac sucks. Yep, he really does. Rock reverses a whip attempt and sends Dogg into the steps. He rams Xpac straight into the ring post but Mr Ass gets a drop toe hold. Ass drops him onto the barrier. HHH is in a leather chair on the entrance ramp. Back in the ring, Dogg is knocked down but Xpac hits a spinning heel kick for 2. The beatdown continues. Nothing but stomps and punches here folks. Dogg tries a suplex on the outside but Rock reverses. Xpac continues the beatdown on the outside. Rock fights back for a moment but Mr Ass quickly stops him and sends him over the announce table. JR is going apeshit about how unfair it is. Dogg throws him back into the ring. More punching in the corner. Rock comes out of the corner with clotheslines and DDT's Mr Ass. Samoan Drop for Xpac and spinebuster for Dogg. Rock hits The People's Elbow but Ass pulls the ref out of the ring. Kick by Xpac. Again. Learn some wrestling ffs Sean Waltman you greasy haired shit. Mr Ass hits a jackhammer. Goldberg: GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT. Bronco Buster by Xpac. Dogg gets a chair but Mick Foley comes out of nowhere and cleans house. HHH comes in and gets DESTROYED by a chairshot. Foley disappears into the crowd. Rockbottom for Mr Ass will get the 3 in 9:15.
Dragged a little but the comeback was well timed and the Foley interference was well done. I liked it. **1/4.
Decent show all in all. Some good angle development and a few solid matches. Plus a WWF title change. Can't complain. Although way too much HHH stuff and that movie was just bizarre. Keep an eye out for my next post, which will be the January 6th edition of Smackdown. See you then!
Friday, 28 January 2011
Random Review #1: Gungrave (PS2)
Firstly, I must apologise in advance. It's currently 9:46 AM, and I haven't been to sleep yet, so excuse me if the review makes no sense. In fact, I almost typed "nose sense" just then instead of "no sense". Maybe not a good idea to be writing a blog then, but I'll persevere. For my first random review, I picked a PS2 game I recently bought for a mere £2 from a store called CEX which sells pre-owned electrical items, games and DVD's among them. I've wanted this game for many years now and decided to finally grab it.
The game sees you play as a mysterious man called Grave, who is technically dead. He is basically a walking tank that can destroy entire waves of enemies by himself, with the downside that his blood needs to be exchanged regularly, otherwise his body would shut down. The story begins in an unnamed city which is being taken over by a gang known as The Syndicate. Their leader, Harry McDowell, is attempting to take over the city. Grave however, doesn't want this to happen: He used to be a former member of The Syndicate you see, that is until good ol' Harry decided to kill Grave 15 years ago. Cue Grave taking his two guns (that he calls Cerberus) and killing roughly 2'000'000'000'000 people in the game.
The game is a hark back to the days of old, when shooters were about hammering fire as much as possible and laughing at how many points you got awarded. It isn't subtle, it certainly isn't very clever, but my god is it fun! Grave is an absolute beast, laughing in the face of trivial weapons such as rocket launchers and machine guns and handing out bullets like they were candy. By "handing out", I of course mean "firing lots of". The controls are simple and well laid out: Square is fire, X is Jump, O is Run, Triangle activates a special ability called "Demolition Shots", which are basically power-ups you earn by shooting people and objects in the environment, L1 is lock-on, L2 is to turn 180°, and R1 is to hit any enemies in the vicinity with the coffin strapped to Grave's back. Simple, but effective. The camera can't actually be controlled manually, meaning some occasional tricky moments, but it's manageable, and certainly does not detract from the action.
The graphics are very surprising. I would even describe them as fantastic. The game is very clearly illustrated by some talented people. In fact, the creator of the "Trigun" Japanese animé series, Yasuhiro Nightow, is responsible for the excellent character designs seen in the game. Grave in particular has a great design, his face conveying a stony look only an undead mute with no feelings could wear. The enemies, considering they get about 0.2 seconds of screen time each before Grave shoots them 50 times, look decent, and the environments are very well varied and nicely designed, with some very nice contrasts between the outdoor scenes and indoor scenes.
The games downsides are pretty much as follows: Firstly, the game is hilariously short, clocking in at about 3 hours at the most. 45 minutes is probably easily achievable on a 2nd or 3rd completion as well. As mentioned earlier, the camera is a little erratic, and considering there's a right analog stick not controlling anything they could have used for camera movement, it's odd the camera is locked like it is. The game is also pretty easy, so it's unlikely you'll get stuck at any one point. These flaws don't detract too much from the experience however, thanks to the generous extras you can unlock, such as a 3D character gallery and early sketches of the characters. And let's face it: Contra is considered a classic, and that game is also extremely short as well.
Gungrave then, is well worth your time. Yes the game is easy. Yes it's very repetitive. Yes, it's as subtle as The Big Show farting. Yes, it's extremely short with no real challenge. And yes, the camera is erratic. And you know what? I enjoyed every bloody second of it.
Pooman's verdict: 8/10
Recommended
I should also point out a animé series based on the game was created. In fact they made 24 episodes, so the games surprisingly deep story is elaborated on much further. Could be worth a look if you enjoyed the game.
The game sees you play as a mysterious man called Grave, who is technically dead. He is basically a walking tank that can destroy entire waves of enemies by himself, with the downside that his blood needs to be exchanged regularly, otherwise his body would shut down. The story begins in an unnamed city which is being taken over by a gang known as The Syndicate. Their leader, Harry McDowell, is attempting to take over the city. Grave however, doesn't want this to happen: He used to be a former member of The Syndicate you see, that is until good ol' Harry decided to kill Grave 15 years ago. Cue Grave taking his two guns (that he calls Cerberus) and killing roughly 2'000'000'000'000 people in the game.
The game is a hark back to the days of old, when shooters were about hammering fire as much as possible and laughing at how many points you got awarded. It isn't subtle, it certainly isn't very clever, but my god is it fun! Grave is an absolute beast, laughing in the face of trivial weapons such as rocket launchers and machine guns and handing out bullets like they were candy. By "handing out", I of course mean "firing lots of". The controls are simple and well laid out: Square is fire, X is Jump, O is Run, Triangle activates a special ability called "Demolition Shots", which are basically power-ups you earn by shooting people and objects in the environment, L1 is lock-on, L2 is to turn 180°, and R1 is to hit any enemies in the vicinity with the coffin strapped to Grave's back. Simple, but effective. The camera can't actually be controlled manually, meaning some occasional tricky moments, but it's manageable, and certainly does not detract from the action.
The graphics are very surprising. I would even describe them as fantastic. The game is very clearly illustrated by some talented people. In fact, the creator of the "Trigun" Japanese animé series, Yasuhiro Nightow, is responsible for the excellent character designs seen in the game. Grave in particular has a great design, his face conveying a stony look only an undead mute with no feelings could wear. The enemies, considering they get about 0.2 seconds of screen time each before Grave shoots them 50 times, look decent, and the environments are very well varied and nicely designed, with some very nice contrasts between the outdoor scenes and indoor scenes.
The games downsides are pretty much as follows: Firstly, the game is hilariously short, clocking in at about 3 hours at the most. 45 minutes is probably easily achievable on a 2nd or 3rd completion as well. As mentioned earlier, the camera is a little erratic, and considering there's a right analog stick not controlling anything they could have used for camera movement, it's odd the camera is locked like it is. The game is also pretty easy, so it's unlikely you'll get stuck at any one point. These flaws don't detract too much from the experience however, thanks to the generous extras you can unlock, such as a 3D character gallery and early sketches of the characters. And let's face it: Contra is considered a classic, and that game is also extremely short as well.
Gungrave then, is well worth your time. Yes the game is easy. Yes it's very repetitive. Yes, it's as subtle as The Big Show farting. Yes, it's extremely short with no real challenge. And yes, the camera is erratic. And you know what? I enjoyed every bloody second of it.
Pooman's verdict: 8/10
Recommended
I should also point out a animé series based on the game was created. In fact they made 24 episodes, so the games surprisingly deep story is elaborated on much further. Could be worth a look if you enjoyed the game.
Thursday, 13 January 2011
10 of the worst games I've ever played
I'm sure you have been there in the past. You've bought a game, whether it was on a whim or whether you were waiting for it to come out, and it's turned out to be a bag of excrement to attempt to play. Now I can believe it is difficult developing a video game. I respect game developers, especially the people who create amazing games and series such as Metal Gear Solid or Fallout 3. However, how some games make it on to the market I'll never fathom. Let's start the countdown shall we? Note these games are in no particular order:
10 - Turning Point: Fall Of Liberty (PS3)
This game had a lot of potential. A decent alternative timeline storyline in which Winston Churchill is killed in the 1930's and therefore the German's invade Britain is a nice, if controversial, idea. The execution however, was dog shit. Shitty graphics, some of the worst enemy AI I've ever witnessed and shoddy controls combined to ensure that this interesting premise was ruined and smashed on the floor.
9 - FIFA 11 (PS3)
The epitome of disappointment. I am a big football fan (soccer to the North American crowd out there) and FIFA 09 remains one of my all time favourite sport games. So after getting both this and Pro Evolution Soccer 2011 for Christmas, I assumed they would share equal time in my PS3. Oh, how wrong I was. Konami has spanked EA this year, delivering a genuinely fun football game which effortlessly pisses all over the slowly decaying corpse of the once great FIFA series. EA's idea of improvements is not fixing any of the problems found in FIFA's of old and instead exacerbating the issues by making it excessively difficult to score. Oh, also the ball has the same physics engine as the Blitzball minigame from Final Fantasy X. Awful, awful game. Thank god for PES.
8 - WWF Smackdown: Just Bring It (PS2)
The first PS2 Smackdown game. What could go wrong? Everything. The wrestlers look like they are covered in baby oil, their arms often go THROUGH the ropes, the story mode lasted about 24 seconds, the game had LESS wrestlers than the Smackdown game before it, the graphics were mediocre and the commentary was hilariously awful. Oh, did I mention it took up almost half a memory card just to save your data?
7 - Action 52 (NES)
Famous for it's awfulness, this game actually cost 200$ when it was first released. I would rather buy a bag of Pee Wee Herman's semen than this game for that price. Of the 52 games, a grand total of 1 is entertaining. That isn't the worst part however. No, the worst part is the huge scam Active Enterprises pulled on everyone who bought this game. Not only did it play like a sachet of Hulk Hogan's vomit, they advertised a contest to win $104'000 for anyone who got to level 5 of god awful platformer Ooze. The problem? The game crashed around level 3 and therefore it was impossible to get to level 5.
6 - Mortal Kombat: Mythologies of Sub Zero (PS1)
A side scrolling platformer with 2D graphics? Check. Unnecessarily complex control scheme? Check. Voice acting that destroys the ears of anyone who hears it? Check. Mythologies was one of the almost fatal blows that ensured the MK series would be knocking on Death's door for years to come. The game had no purpose for existing whatsoever, it added nothing new to the genre or indeed the series and almost all of it's features were poorly implemented. Oh, also to turn around you have to press a button. Now try fighting 2 guys, 1 on either side of the screen. Fun isn't it? Oh wait. It isn't.
5 - Time Crisis 4 (PS3)
Remember when Namco used to be good? You know, Pacman, Tekken, Time Crisis? Sadly, those days are long gone. With Pacman jumping the shark years ago, Tekken following up on the excellent 5 with a merely average 6th instalment and Time Crisis in limbo, it's no wonder Namco are a shadow of their old self. Time Crisis was a great premise for a lightgun game, and yet so simple. The fantastic 2nd game was followed up by a very good 3rd, and it looked as 4 would continue the good streak. Sadly, the game was a confusing mess, with no semblance of a plot and a terrible new enemy which basically consists of robot insects. Yes, really. Some advice for Namco: Stick to what you know. Lightgun games are pretty simple to create, just give us balanced difficulty and plenty of explosions. No more robot ants next time please. Thank you.
4 - Resident Evil 5 (PS3)
The Resident Evil series is famous for many things: Zombies, loads of spin-offs and more comebacks than Elvis. With the magnificent sequel that was Resident Evil 4, Capcom had a tremendous chance to rebuild the franchise after years of bad decisions. However, they undid all of their good work previously with RE5, one of the most disappointing sequels I have ever played. The graphics could not make up for the poorly designed Co-op, lack of new features and the endless rehashing of enemies and scenarios from 4. Not only that, but the plot is laughable in it's needless complexity and the final boss fight is a shambles that sees your character, Chris, PUNCHING A BOULDER. STUPIDEST. SCENE. EVER.
3 - Kane & Lynch 2: Dog Days (PS3)
One day a small developer created a game called "Hitman: Codename 47" and followed this up with 3 fantastic sequels, and life was good. Then they decided to diversify, starting with 2004 shooter Freedom Fighters (I recommend this game) and 2007's Kane & Lynch: Dead Men. While K&L1 had it's flaws, the game still remained entertaining and overall is worth a go. The sequel however, undoes anything the original did well and instead goes down a decidedly schizophrenic route. The controls remain an issue in K&L2, but they are made 100 times worse by the ridiculous camera, which will not stay fucking still. Seriously. It's as though Michael J Fox is filming you with his early 90's Panasonic. Not only that, but the mere fact the cover system doesn't work correctly will combine to give the player an aneurysm. Just do yourself a favour and get Freedom Fighters or K&L1. In fact, buy anything else. Just not this.
2 - Tomb Raider: The Angel Of Darkness (PS2)
Good lord. What is this!? The controls are WORSE than the PS1 games!? There's a stealth section!? THIS DREADLOCK SPORTING MORON IS THE CO-STAR!? ARRRRGGGHHHH!!!
^Written above is pretty much my reaction to playing this abortion. I can safely say this mess is the reason we now have Tomb Raider games with no personality. Core Design's swansong for the series, Angel Of Darkness is an example of what can happen when greed overtakes creativity. I don't think it's a coincidence that AOD developers Core Design and publisher Eidos are no more when they released crap like this. (Eidos are still around. Sort of. Square Enix purchased them and will be closing their studio down soon.)
1 - Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow (PS2)
I am a big Splinter Cell fan. The first game was the first serious competitor to the MGS series, deciding to scrap the outlandish plot and over the top cut scenes in favour of gritty realism and to-the-point gameplay. And it worked. Although not as good as the MGS games, it is a great alternative to them nonetheless. That is, apart from Pandora Tomorrow, the second game in the series. The idea to introduce a multiplayer online mode is fine in theory. The problem is twofold. Firstly, the PS2 online scene was a joke and a failed experiment on Sony's part. Secondly, it led to the offline crowd getting the most lazy single player campaign possible. The game has no creativity whatsoever. Not only that, they replaced Lambert's voice actor with the president from 24, despite him sounding completely different to the original actor. It boils down to a Barry White soundalike shouting in your ear whilst you trot around boring maps, doing dull objectives with the same problems as the first game but with unfair AI on top of that. Combine that with the downright bullshit alert system and what do you have? Frustration. Fuck you, Barry White soundalike. Just fuck you.
10 - Turning Point: Fall Of Liberty (PS3)
This game had a lot of potential. A decent alternative timeline storyline in which Winston Churchill is killed in the 1930's and therefore the German's invade Britain is a nice, if controversial, idea. The execution however, was dog shit. Shitty graphics, some of the worst enemy AI I've ever witnessed and shoddy controls combined to ensure that this interesting premise was ruined and smashed on the floor.
9 - FIFA 11 (PS3)
The epitome of disappointment. I am a big football fan (soccer to the North American crowd out there) and FIFA 09 remains one of my all time favourite sport games. So after getting both this and Pro Evolution Soccer 2011 for Christmas, I assumed they would share equal time in my PS3. Oh, how wrong I was. Konami has spanked EA this year, delivering a genuinely fun football game which effortlessly pisses all over the slowly decaying corpse of the once great FIFA series. EA's idea of improvements is not fixing any of the problems found in FIFA's of old and instead exacerbating the issues by making it excessively difficult to score. Oh, also the ball has the same physics engine as the Blitzball minigame from Final Fantasy X. Awful, awful game. Thank god for PES.
8 - WWF Smackdown: Just Bring It (PS2)
The first PS2 Smackdown game. What could go wrong? Everything. The wrestlers look like they are covered in baby oil, their arms often go THROUGH the ropes, the story mode lasted about 24 seconds, the game had LESS wrestlers than the Smackdown game before it, the graphics were mediocre and the commentary was hilariously awful. Oh, did I mention it took up almost half a memory card just to save your data?
7 - Action 52 (NES)
Famous for it's awfulness, this game actually cost 200$ when it was first released. I would rather buy a bag of Pee Wee Herman's semen than this game for that price. Of the 52 games, a grand total of 1 is entertaining. That isn't the worst part however. No, the worst part is the huge scam Active Enterprises pulled on everyone who bought this game. Not only did it play like a sachet of Hulk Hogan's vomit, they advertised a contest to win $104'000 for anyone who got to level 5 of god awful platformer Ooze. The problem? The game crashed around level 3 and therefore it was impossible to get to level 5.
6 - Mortal Kombat: Mythologies of Sub Zero (PS1)
A side scrolling platformer with 2D graphics? Check. Unnecessarily complex control scheme? Check. Voice acting that destroys the ears of anyone who hears it? Check. Mythologies was one of the almost fatal blows that ensured the MK series would be knocking on Death's door for years to come. The game had no purpose for existing whatsoever, it added nothing new to the genre or indeed the series and almost all of it's features were poorly implemented. Oh, also to turn around you have to press a button. Now try fighting 2 guys, 1 on either side of the screen. Fun isn't it? Oh wait. It isn't.
5 - Time Crisis 4 (PS3)
Remember when Namco used to be good? You know, Pacman, Tekken, Time Crisis? Sadly, those days are long gone. With Pacman jumping the shark years ago, Tekken following up on the excellent 5 with a merely average 6th instalment and Time Crisis in limbo, it's no wonder Namco are a shadow of their old self. Time Crisis was a great premise for a lightgun game, and yet so simple. The fantastic 2nd game was followed up by a very good 3rd, and it looked as 4 would continue the good streak. Sadly, the game was a confusing mess, with no semblance of a plot and a terrible new enemy which basically consists of robot insects. Yes, really. Some advice for Namco: Stick to what you know. Lightgun games are pretty simple to create, just give us balanced difficulty and plenty of explosions. No more robot ants next time please. Thank you.
4 - Resident Evil 5 (PS3)
The Resident Evil series is famous for many things: Zombies, loads of spin-offs and more comebacks than Elvis. With the magnificent sequel that was Resident Evil 4, Capcom had a tremendous chance to rebuild the franchise after years of bad decisions. However, they undid all of their good work previously with RE5, one of the most disappointing sequels I have ever played. The graphics could not make up for the poorly designed Co-op, lack of new features and the endless rehashing of enemies and scenarios from 4. Not only that, but the plot is laughable in it's needless complexity and the final boss fight is a shambles that sees your character, Chris, PUNCHING A BOULDER. STUPIDEST. SCENE. EVER.
3 - Kane & Lynch 2: Dog Days (PS3)
One day a small developer created a game called "Hitman: Codename 47" and followed this up with 3 fantastic sequels, and life was good. Then they decided to diversify, starting with 2004 shooter Freedom Fighters (I recommend this game) and 2007's Kane & Lynch: Dead Men. While K&L1 had it's flaws, the game still remained entertaining and overall is worth a go. The sequel however, undoes anything the original did well and instead goes down a decidedly schizophrenic route. The controls remain an issue in K&L2, but they are made 100 times worse by the ridiculous camera, which will not stay fucking still. Seriously. It's as though Michael J Fox is filming you with his early 90's Panasonic. Not only that, but the mere fact the cover system doesn't work correctly will combine to give the player an aneurysm. Just do yourself a favour and get Freedom Fighters or K&L1. In fact, buy anything else. Just not this.
2 - Tomb Raider: The Angel Of Darkness (PS2)
Good lord. What is this!? The controls are WORSE than the PS1 games!? There's a stealth section!? THIS DREADLOCK SPORTING MORON IS THE CO-STAR!? ARRRRGGGHHHH!!!
^Written above is pretty much my reaction to playing this abortion. I can safely say this mess is the reason we now have Tomb Raider games with no personality. Core Design's swansong for the series, Angel Of Darkness is an example of what can happen when greed overtakes creativity. I don't think it's a coincidence that AOD developers Core Design and publisher Eidos are no more when they released crap like this. (Eidos are still around. Sort of. Square Enix purchased them and will be closing their studio down soon.)
1 - Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow (PS2)
I am a big Splinter Cell fan. The first game was the first serious competitor to the MGS series, deciding to scrap the outlandish plot and over the top cut scenes in favour of gritty realism and to-the-point gameplay. And it worked. Although not as good as the MGS games, it is a great alternative to them nonetheless. That is, apart from Pandora Tomorrow, the second game in the series. The idea to introduce a multiplayer online mode is fine in theory. The problem is twofold. Firstly, the PS2 online scene was a joke and a failed experiment on Sony's part. Secondly, it led to the offline crowd getting the most lazy single player campaign possible. The game has no creativity whatsoever. Not only that, they replaced Lambert's voice actor with the president from 24, despite him sounding completely different to the original actor. It boils down to a Barry White soundalike shouting in your ear whilst you trot around boring maps, doing dull objectives with the same problems as the first game but with unfair AI on top of that. Combine that with the downright bullshit alert system and what do you have? Frustration. Fuck you, Barry White soundalike. Just fuck you.
Wednesday, 12 January 2011
Why attempting to sell your home sucks
For my first post on here I figured I'd address something that really gets on my nerves: Selling your house.
So, for backstory, I've lived in my current house since 2001, and I like it here. My room is a decent size, the area is relatively quiet, and I know where everything is. It feels familiar. Comfortable. My mother however, disagrees, saying the house has "bad memories" and "we have to downsize". Now this is the part that puzzles me. I can understand why downsizing is necessary. After all, it's just me, my mum and my dog in our 3 bedroomed house. Therefore, it makes sense to move to a smaller home, especially since I'll probably be moving within 2 years or so. It's the bad memories argument that irritates me.
The bad memories will not go away. They are not attached to a load of bricks, and they certainly won't be suppressed just by moving slightly down the road. I just cannot understand how memories can be attached in this way to what is essentially a building. But that isn't the worst part of selling. No, the worst part is the ignorant bastards who walk into your house.
I can tolerate leaving them doors open when they leave a room. I can just about tolerate the snide comments such as "this room is quite small" or "I don't like laminate flooring". But I will not have some snobbish idiot attempting to use their vocabulary to drive down the price to an almost laughable level. Who on earth would sell a 3 bedroomed house for the same price as most 2 bedroomed houses sell for in worst parts of the city? And the worse thing is, they actually have a chance. My mum has a problem, and that is she actually still has faith in the human race. I don't think she realises that most, if not all people, are selfish bastards who will do everything they can to take from others and give nothing back. Humans are selfish in nature, and that is something we cannot avoid.
Now I'm not suggesting you embrace the selfishness of humanity. I simply suggest you do everything you can to fight for what you need, and next time someone tries to tell you different, don't let them. That isn't selfishness, that is merely looking after number 1. Just remember, number 2 may let you down, but that is irrelevant if number 1 stays strong.
So, for backstory, I've lived in my current house since 2001, and I like it here. My room is a decent size, the area is relatively quiet, and I know where everything is. It feels familiar. Comfortable. My mother however, disagrees, saying the house has "bad memories" and "we have to downsize". Now this is the part that puzzles me. I can understand why downsizing is necessary. After all, it's just me, my mum and my dog in our 3 bedroomed house. Therefore, it makes sense to move to a smaller home, especially since I'll probably be moving within 2 years or so. It's the bad memories argument that irritates me.
The bad memories will not go away. They are not attached to a load of bricks, and they certainly won't be suppressed just by moving slightly down the road. I just cannot understand how memories can be attached in this way to what is essentially a building. But that isn't the worst part of selling. No, the worst part is the ignorant bastards who walk into your house.
I can tolerate leaving them doors open when they leave a room. I can just about tolerate the snide comments such as "this room is quite small" or "I don't like laminate flooring". But I will not have some snobbish idiot attempting to use their vocabulary to drive down the price to an almost laughable level. Who on earth would sell a 3 bedroomed house for the same price as most 2 bedroomed houses sell for in worst parts of the city? And the worse thing is, they actually have a chance. My mum has a problem, and that is she actually still has faith in the human race. I don't think she realises that most, if not all people, are selfish bastards who will do everything they can to take from others and give nothing back. Humans are selfish in nature, and that is something we cannot avoid.
Now I'm not suggesting you embrace the selfishness of humanity. I simply suggest you do everything you can to fight for what you need, and next time someone tries to tell you different, don't let them. That isn't selfishness, that is merely looking after number 1. Just remember, number 2 may let you down, but that is irrelevant if number 1 stays strong.
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